For most of us who desire to have a baby, one of the catalysts that created that feeling was our connection with our partner. It makes it that much more frustrating, that when we struggle to conceive, that relationship is the first thing that is challenged. Coming together becomes a chore or a check on our to-do list. Yet it is still of the utmost importance to connect. Truly connect in a loving way.
When is the last time you were on a date with your love? Sitting down and talking. Looking in each others eyes and laughing together? If you don’t know the answer to that, or if the answer isn’t within the last two weeks, I urge you to put it on top of your priority list.
Fertility challenges really have a way of making or breaking a couple. Even the strongest couples will go through times that they feel just a little less in love. Make it a point to find that loving feeling for the sake of your fertile health.
From a more scientific point of view: connecting more with your partner helps to increase levels of oxytocin in your body. Oxytocin is known as the feel good hormone and can help to reduce stress levels. Although none of us want to hear that kind of crap from a well meaning auntie, “Oh, just stop stressing about it and it will happen.” We all know that there is some truth to it. Stress is the number one hormone disruptor.
Some natural ways to increase oxytocin in your life:
3. playing with a pet
Oxytocin aside… connecting with our partner more frequently makes our body more used to their body. So what’s a couple to do when busy lives and stressful situations interfere? Try this one out:
Sit down together and make a list of all the things that each of you would like to do together. Or maybe it is your fave date that you have already done. You can each make your own list or make one big list. Separate the list into ‘Grand Dates’ and ‘Mini Dates’. Now get yourself two cups and a bag of popsicle sticks (easily found at most craft supply stores) and write down the ideas on the popsicle sticks. You can put the sticks in the cups and set up a game plan that works best for you. Agree to how often you will draw a stick from each cup and stick to it. I would recommend to draw a stick from the ‘Mini Dates’ every week and a stick from the ‘Grand Dates’ once a month. In case you need some inspiration here are some ideas:
+read a book together
+hike or walk
+picnic in the park
+write vows to each other
I hope that gets you started and gives you some ideas. And I hope that you see that it doesn’t have to be anything extra special. It’s special just to spend some time together and reconnect. A baby created by love is a wonderful thing. That loving feeling is so worth working for.
This post is also available in: Arabic