Coping through the holidays with infertility

During this time of year, certain cultures around the world are celebrating a festive season. From holiday songs and decorations, to special feasts and gatherings of loved ones, many are putting the final touches on plans to commemorate faith and the reason for the season.

For couples trying to conceive, managing the emotions and stress of infertility can be a daunting task, but during the holidays, it can be especially difficult. There are a number of couples who are hurting so much during this time of year as it can be a painful reminder that one most precious gift is missing; and that is, a baby.

The holidays should be a time for us to enjoy the tidings of the season and I hope that you are replenishing your heart and spirit to cope as you continue to face your fertility struggles. Here are some helpful tips to get you through the season:

  1. Know that you may be in some uncomfortable situations if people start to ask questions about your fertility plans or progress. It is helpful to have a few answers to those commonly asked questions already prepared so that you can better manage the conversation, without being emotionally depleted afterwards.
  2. YOU are in complete control of what you share with others, and it is OK to share nothing. Sometimes that means you have to be aggressive and speak up for yourself with those around you who have no filter and no sensitivity to what you may be dealing with emotionally due to infertility.
  3. Consider keeping a daily gratitude list. By doing so, it focuses your mind on what you DO have and enables you to attract more of those things to you. Constantly thinking about what you do not have creates a space for sadness and disappointment to take over your mind and your entire being.
  4. Practice lots of self care and pamper yourself. Schedule in time to get a massage or have a spa day so that you can relax. Practicing good self care techniques ensures that you are replenishing your soul and spirit.


Managing through the holiday season can be so difficult when all you want is to unwrap the blanket off of your own snuggly and precious baby. Take it from me. I have been there and understand the myriad feelings and wondering how to answer one more question about our fertility plans at dinners or holiday parties. This year, I vowed that our holiday season would be different, and thus far, it has been !

By following some of the advice I just shared with you, I have been able to experience what the season really means and basking in thankfulness and gratitude for all of the many wonderful things in my life. For example, good health, a loving husband and supportive partner, an amazing son, meaningful relationships all around me, just to name a few.

Don’t let getting through the holiday season be a stress-filled event for you and your family. Live your life one moment at a time; and be appreciative and thankful for your current blessings while you continue to prepare your mind and your body for that most anticipated gift that is soon to come; a baby.




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